I doubt anyone will read this. If you do, this blog is written in a way that expresses my feelings in an unfiltered way. My blog will probably sound dramatic, but damn it, it is mine!!! Let's get this shit rolling!
I just erased 20 minutes worth of writing. The way that story was going, it was stupid. I'll cut to the chase. I dated a wonderful girl for a year, lived with her for about 4 months, told her I loved her and then I broke up with her. I never could bring myself to love her the way she deserved. I was wrong because I didn't allow myself to fall for her entirely because I could never love her for who she was. I hated her past (although it had nothing to do with me!). I didn't like that she was a little chubby (who am I to judge?). I don't know why, but I tried so hard to find something wrong with her.
These self induced road blocks are what caused me to judge one of God's angels in a way she didn't deserve. I was so mean to her. Never in an outright way. It was always through snide remarks and stupid little comments that didn't always have a harmful intent that I chipped away at her soul. She never complained about it. She took it. I wish she would have said something.
I wish I would never have met her. I wouldn't have hurt her then. The only reason I met her was because someone at work made a mistake.
Posted by scrolio
at 3:50 PM MST